Hello my dear asters,
The lockdown has been on for six months now. The virus is still out there. You can’t go back to your old lives any time soon even though a lot of restrictions have been lifted. Your mental health has been shit for months now. But you are fed up. You want to do something but your mind has been in a state of inactivity for too long?
So what to do ?
I’ve made a step by step guide on how to find your way back. This helped me get out of my rut and I hope it helps you too.
1. Stop beating yourself up.
Nothing is going to change by constantly abusing yourself. It’s okay not to be okay 😉 . Allow yourself to be scared, sad and vulnerable. I learnt that in order to move forward from something it is necessary to face it head on first, no matter how terrifying it is.
2. Accept the circumstances.
I know it seems like such literal advice. But constantly denying and resisting change is not going to help. Maybe you cannot go out to eat like old times, maybe you cannot meet up with close friends, but the truth is we are all struggling in one way or the other. Try finding the silver lining, for example, we can still be in contact with loved ones and video calls with your humans is possible. I guess that is better than nothing.
3. Remember that communication is always key.
Mental health has been quite a struggle in the lockdown. And when you see the percentage of rise in mental illness, it is quite alarming and depressing. As someone who likes solitude, I can vouch for the fact that during this uncertain period, being by myself was one of the worst places to be. To maintain your mental health, reaching out and talking to people is really important. If you are an extreme introvert, journal. Cry your hearts out if it helps. If you ask for help, there is always someone who is willing to help you. Remember that. Don’t try to put all your emotions in a box and shove it into a corner. Trust me it is not gonna work, darling.
The relationship with yourself takes the same amount of effort as any other relationship in your life.
4. Getting back is not easy.
You want to stop feeling miserable. So you keep an alarm for 6.00 am the next day. Plan your whole day the night before. But you get up at 8.00 the next day and that’s it the day is ruined.
The thing is that journey to get back is not a smooth highway road.
It is the bad road with pitholes which becomes worse after a spell of rain.
So you are gonna go back to feeling bad again more than a couple of times before starting to feel a bit better.
5. The key is to start small.
Baby steps. My favourite advice for any person who is struggling with yourself.
When you start small your brain does not restrain you or make you feel too lazy to do it. Baby steps is the best way to rebel against your own brain’s comfort zone.
6. Start out with what you love.
When I was struggling to go forward, I started to paint. 3-4 hours a day.
So I love to paint for fun. So with every stroke of the brush, I asked myself to be more present.
Start doing something you’ve always loved. It will help you. I really mean it.
7. Make a list.
Don’t make a :
- 2 hours workout
- 8 hours studying
- 3 hours cleaning ,
kind of extreme list.
Make the most basic list ever. Keep it simple.
For example, I made a list of what I wanted to generally change in my life from the upcoming week and it went something like this. This is not a to-do list for a day, these are things I wanted to incorporate in my life.
- Workout 4 – 5 times a week. ( min 15 mins)
- Comb my hair daily. (LOL)
- Self care
- Try watercolors.
- Start looking about how to set up a self-hosted blog. ( I did that. Yay)
This was how basic I started.
I just took a little bit better care of myself. And started to do something.
And everything else develops on its own when you build a good foundation.
8. Just do it.
I know, you know who’s tagline it is. But sometimes the only solution to do what you want is to actually start doing something.
9. Back to square one.
So, there will be times when you are gonna relapse but, it’s all part of the journey. Yes, you are gonna fall back into the hole but this time it will be less deep and a hole with a ladder on the side.
You will know what to do this time, therefore keep doing it until you are out of the hole.
10. Remember you are not alone in this.
You are the only person who knows your demons. I agree. But the COVID 19 situation has made everyone face their inner demons at some point or the other. So remember to be more altruistic. Everyone’s fighting battles they cannot talk about. So be more forgiving to others and yourself.
And always remember that even if you get out of the rut you will have to constantly work on yourself, that is, it does not stop after a particular day. You just become happier and ready to embrace whatever comes your way after you fight your way against it.
If you stayed till the end of the post, do leave a comment.
Love,
The butterfly girl. xoxoxo
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